My mother-in-law thinks I have superpowers. We went over for dinner a couple of weeks ago, and they’d put up their little tree. The presents were wrapped all nice and pleasingly arranged around and under it. She was so proud of what she came up with as a gift.
When we arrived, I took one look at the wrapped box and pretty much knew what it was.
I can’t explain how I know, I just know. I haven’t been allowed to hold presents in years. Several years ago, I asked Shawshank to stop showing me presents. I was tired of looking at them and knowing. My dad is the same way, he’s pretty good at figuring that shit out. Unlike him, I don’t run the fun for people. I never say anything about my predictions beforehand.
Oh lawd, she sewing.
