An Empty Wall

Last night was a better sleep than the night before. Shawshank tried to make me feel better about the shitty sleep. “You were just excited to get up, like Christmas morning”, he said.

“No, I’m just scared that I finally made a decision to do things”, I replied. “I’m serious here. I’m terrified.”

And I totally am. I’ve been coasting along since February 22nd, because I couldn’t actually go anywhere. Now that the hours at work have changed enough and made things really tight – much tighter – in the budget, I need to leave. I simply can’t afford to stay because I’ve pretty much run out of things to sell.

And even though the plan to move south is only a temporary move, it’s still scary.

A while ago, Shawshank told me that one morning, I would look around the house and think it looked empty. This morning was the first time this happened. The antique commode that’s been in the dining room forever isn’t there against the wall. Last night, I instinctively looked for its shadow when I walked through the darkness into the kitchen. This morning, I’m still weirdly “dodging it” when I walk through the space.

The phones at work are dead again. We’ve started to wonder if this is something the company doesn’t intend to fin. Like, maybe they’re just ignoring us because they want an excuse to close us down. Too many customer complaints because we won’t fix the phones? Oh, it’s not a busy location, just shut it down.

Today’s another split shift between StressedRPh and Capt. Useless. Thankfully, I only have to spend three hours with him. Unfortunately, DayTech has an entire late shift with him. When I get home, the boys will have their new litter box. Plus, I should have someone over to pick up the Christmas tree – FINALLY.

I’ll believe it when the dude has it in his vehicle and I have the money in my hand.