today will be better

Happy Friday, the weekend is here. Mal is running around, chasing a fly. Hopefully he can catch it, because it’s been evading me for a day now.

Yesterday was TERRIBLE. Brian’s mom showed up unexpectedly while Mom was just finishing up a shower. She stayed and talked about the horror show of a road trip they took north. This tale included the phrase “I HAD A SHIT ATTACK”, and featured other stories such as “IT’S MY SHIT IN A BOX” and “CAN YOU EVEN GO 15 MINUTES WITHOUT STUFFING YOUR FACE?!”.

An unknown number called while she regaled us with the story of the trip. Assuming it was more scams about my vehicle warranty, I ignored it and opted to listen to their voicemail. Nope! The voicemail is from someplace that sounds like a law firm and says they’re trying to get in touch with me regarding some paperwork they sent me. On one hand, they were asking for me by my unmarried name, so I knew it was probably a collection agency and intended on ignoring them.

Because ignoring them always works out in these cases.

On the other hand, they called my mother and my sister as well. My sister called me, frantic, to tell me they’d left her a voicemail as well. Not wanting to bother me if it was a scam, she googled the company name to see if it was real. But remember what I said about the company name sounding like a law firm? Yeah. My sister is on the phone, having “researched” this place. One of the top results is an ad for a law firm that seems to specialize in nationwide law suits about cancer causing drugs and Catholic church abuse. Given all the shit that’s gone on between me and Shawshank for the last three years, now I have to call them. I thanked my sister for calling and had a panic attack at a level I don’t think I’ve had since the morning I drove away from Rhode Island.

But…. Brian’s mother is here. I have zero privacy in the other room, and it’s impolite to leave Mom alone to deal with her. I had to sit in the living room and wait another 20 minutes for her to leave. Naturally, I spent that time trying to figure out what was happening, looking up court case info and scaring myself. It. Was. BAD.

In the end, it was a collection agency with a name that sounds like a law firm. It took me several hours to feel slightly normal again. My Visa card from 1996 is paid off. I smoked my face off in the backyard.

Today will be better.