“Hey, I gave a question”, I yelled from the bathroom. “I feel weird asking it but it’s been in my head for two days now”.
Shawshank replied with one word – “Ok” – that somehow managed to convey both fear of and curiosity about my query.
“Ok, so is ‘milf’ a classification based on motherhood, or age? I mean, really, it doesn’t make sense to base the entire category of adult media on a hypothetical offspring”.
He stared at me, like you do when your wife poses this question to you from the toilet.
“Like, I’m not a mother,” I continued. “But I could be, and it’s not like anyone ever asks for proof. So can I call myself a milf if I don’t have kids?”
For a moment, even the man who managed a porn shop was stumped.