On a Desert Island

And your hearts against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck by Shawshank (voidifremoved.net)

So here’s where (hopefully) some reader participation comes into play; what are the top 3 books that you’d bring with you, if you found yourself trapped on a deserted island? Would you bring mystery, or a colouring book, or even some self-help books?

Shawshank posted about what books he would want to take if he was stranded on a deserted island. Now, first we need to discuss the logistics of planning ahead for a stranding. If there’s a possibility of being stranded, do I want to bring books that would be helpful? Or, should I bring something for entertainment while I await the sweet release of Death’s embrace? Am I with someone else?

Ok, so logistics aside, if I had books with me, I’d want entertainment. Let’s face it, Hermit Girl isn’t going to bother with survival. I’m gonna park my ass under a palm tree and read. If I die, I die with a book in my hands. I’d better make good choices.

Book #1: IT – Stephen King

When I was about 12, my mother let me read my first Stephen King book, a battered paperback copy of Eyes of the Dragon. It wasn’t scary, and I don’t remember there being anything overtly sexual in it. I moved on to The Shining, and then stole my grandfather’s copy of IT.

I read that book every summer for the next 15 years. I’ve moved on to a Kindle copy, but IT‘s still one of my absolute favorites, and I’m probably up to 20 times by now. It has its flaws, mostly King’s inability to write an ending to a story that doesn’t seem like the cocaine wore off and he realized his deadline was 2 weeks prior.

We won’t even get into the pre-teen gang-bang.

Book #2: Gone with the Wind – Margaret Mitchell

In 8th grade, my homeroom was located right next to the school library. Unlike elementary school, middle school didn’t have a set “library period”, a fact I hated. Eighth grade was awesome. I could spend the time before homeroom in the library picking out books I wouldn’t have had the chance to read otherwise. I read a lot of Shakespeare that year, along with Mary Stewart’s Crystal Cave (and the rest of the Arthurian Saga). However, the one that I took out all the time was Gone with the Wind.

I don’t know exactly why I liked it. I think it was the idea of a southern belle surviving when the odds were against her. My grandmother and I bonded over it, and I laughed about how she had to sneakily read it while babysitting because it was so scandalous to her mother. Over the years, I still enjoyed it, even when my opinion switched from romantic ideas about the south to “this, this is kinda racist”, I still read it almost every year.

Eventually, I realized Scarlet is a fucking cunt. It’s still one of my favorites, and I have a lovely old copy from the 40’s in the box of books I’ll travel with.

Book(s) #3: VOX and The Fermata – Nicholson Baker

I grew up in that weird, in-between time of tech. Internet porn was around on USENET or BBSs, because everything else was too slow. Finding porn in the woods was still a thing.

I picked up VOX on a clearance shelf at a library book sale and later picked up The Fermata at a book store in the mall. Before those, the only books I had that depicted anything sexual were either

• a) shoehorned into horror
• b) Jean Auel’s Earth’s Children series
• c) Ann Rice’s Sleeping Beauty series

none of which are particularly realistic. While neither of Baker’s books are life-changing literary works, they certainly were more educational about sexuality in general than any of the other stuff I’d read up until then.

And they’re entertaining.